kapoed all this from haha.com. haha.

Blonde in Disguise
A blonde wanted to buy a TV, so she went into the store. She found one she wanted, and asked the shop assistant what the price was. "I'm sorry, we don't serve blondes," his reply was. The blonde walked out, and got her hair colored into red. Next day, she walked in, and asked the shop assistant how much her chosen TV was. "I'm sorry, we don't serve blondes," his reply was again. She was confused. So, again, she walked out. She got her hair colored into black. Next day, she walked in, and asked how much was her chosen TV. "I'm sorry, we don't serve blondes!" his reply was again. Now the blonde was really confused. "How did you know I was a blonde?" asked the girl. "Well, because what you've got there is a microwave. "

The Blonde Painter
One day a blonde comes out of the tanning salon. She wants to make some money so she goes to one of the rich neighborhoods. She rings the door bell and say, "HI,is there anything I could do for your house or u???" The man thinks and says, "Sure, can paint my porch. You will find all the stuff in the garage." The girl says, "O.K., How much will you pay me?" The man says, "How much does fifty bucks sound?" The quickly agrees and get straight to work. The wife who had heard the conversation inside says, "50 bucks, I hope she knows the porch goes all around the house!" 25 minutes later the girl knocks on the door and says, "O.K. I am done. Can I have my money now?" surprised the man replies, "O.K. Let me get the money" he comes back and the girl says as she is leaving, "By the way, it's a Ferrari, not a Porch!"

Deer Tracks
Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks." The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks." "No. Those are deer tracks." They keep arguing, and arguing, and one half hour later they were both killed by a train.

Have another Drink
A brunette, redhead, and a blonde go into a bar. The brunette says to the barkeep, "I'd like a BL." The bartender replies, "What's a BL?" The brunette answers in a snotty voice, "A Bud Light. DUH!"So, the bartender dutifully serves up a Bud Light. Then, the redhead says, "I'd like an ML." The bartender asks, "What's an ML?" The redhead answers, as if to a slow child, "Miller Lite. DUH!" After serving the redhead, the bartender, now wary and on alert, turns to the blonde.She says, "I'd like a fifteen, please." The bartender thinks and then says, "Okay, I understand that a BL is a Bud Light and an ML is a Miller Lite. But, I can't figure out what a fifteen is."The blonde rolls her eyes, tosses her hair and answers, "A Seven and Seven. DUH!"

Locked Out
Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger:Blonde #1: "I can't seem to get this door unlocked!" Blonde #2: "Well, you'd better hurry up and try harder, its starting to rain and the top is down